Nighttime with Baby

You are probably expecting this post to be about how Blake finally slept through the night, or how I am so eager for these nighttime feedings to be over...Quite the opposite, I just want to write to share how much I love my late-night times with the little boy!

Oh, he is so precious. When it is time for him to eat (and he calls me through the monitor), I go to the nursery and pick up the little boy from where he is sleeping. Sometimes I leave him swaddled if I think he doesn't smell messy and I don't plan to change him; I don't want to wake him all the way unncessarily. But if I leave him swaddled I miss his little fingers wrapped around mine and the way he puts his arms around me! (And usually I don't like him to sleep in a wet diaper anyway, so I should unswaddle him, right? At least that is the explanation I give my husband!)

Most times I do unswaddle him to nurse. His eyes are usually closed as he eats, but sometimes he looks up at mommy and I softly tell him how much I love him. He holds my finger or I hold his little hands in mine. Then half way through his "mid-night meal" I change him. He is usually wide-eyed and very calm on the changing table, just looking up at mommy, sometimes with a little coo or a smile that melts my heart. Absolutely precious. And then I swaddle him. He has learned to just let mommy do it, without protesting, and lies compliantly with arms straight down on both sides as I do so.

And then he finishes nursing. He is typically a little more alert after the changing/swaddling, but it doesn't take long for his eye lids to get heavy, and he typically falls asleep by the end (sometimes mommy has dozed off a little, too). Then I put the sleepy baby on my shoulder to burp him. He barely wakes up for the burping (I'm not sure if it does at all). Sometimes he complies and lets out a little air bubble or two, and then he snuggles into my shoulder. I love it when he faces me and I can touch his soft little cheek with mine, and I hear his deep, sleepy breaths in my ear. I just want to hold him there for hours, but I remember that I need my sleep, too, and I know I need to lay him back down, but not without a few minutes of cuddle time. During the day he would quickly wake up with protests if I put him down while he was still slightly awake, but at night, sometimes I put him down with eyes still open. Usually within a matter of minutes they close, however, sometimes with the help of a pacifier, and sometimes because Mommy strokes his forehead very softly and shushes in his ear.

These are very sweet times! If Mike wakes up when I get back into bed I usually tell him all about the sweet coos and cuddles (and Mike is very patient to listen, even though I am am sure he is eager to get back to sleep). Blake is slowly extending his night-time sleep, and I realize these mid-night feedings will not last forever, and I will miss them when they are over! For now, I love my special time with my little boy, and I thank God that I get to do this!

Sure, I get time with the boy during the day, but it is a special blessing to have this un-interrupted, quiet time with him each night.